We carry in our heart the motherhood we were raised under, it has shaped us, developed the lens through which we view life, much of who she is has been weaved into our character -
As mothers we pass on who we are, and what we came from is part of who we are, all the good, but also the bad that has not been sifted, sorted, healed, forgiven and overcome.
All that is within us comes out, somehow, somewhere. sometime - we are a sieve....
I do believe this is something we are aware of, but often forget. For our health and wholeness and for the health and wholeness of our children, finding the courage to wander the hallways of our soul is important.....
to settle the score with forgiveness, follow the thread of outbursts to the gnarly lump of hurt and seek healing, choose honesty over denial, to admit where we self-medicate in order to deal with pain/loneliness/low self-esteem etc. and be courageous in the path to change.
For this is true: We are not alone in this + all of heaven is for us, the creator of heaven and earth, God is with us, He desires wholeness in every part of our being, body, soul and spirit - the path to this is found in Him, it is found with Him and through Him as He provides us with the strength to overcome every obstacle, the oil that heals every wound and the miracle life that creates new beginnings.
We raise our children through much of what we say, but even more through what we do, how we handle and treat ourselves and others, our attitudes and moods, our silent communications spill out and are picked up by their keen spirit, that senses much, hears the unspoken, understands little but tucks all in the heart where everything simmers and will in time become blooms on the branches of their character - good and bad.
I was raised by a perfectly imperfect woman, who went through struggles, disappointments and heart break, but that's not the point, we all go through 'stuff'.
The point is how we deal with it,
because that's the part we pass on.
Here is my example - here is my mother.......
I have seen her smile and laugh, I have seen her cry, bent over from deep hurt in her soul...
I have seen her in heavy silence and I have heard her voice lifted in anger...
I have seen her bold and also fearful...
- but I have never seen self pity -
there have been steep mountains for her to overcome, but I have seen her reach the top and lift her eyes to heaven with renewed strength...
with mature eyes I have recognized courage in her,
the courage that will rise up against oppression, with trembling heart make her voice heard...
- I know she was a victim, but she has never lived nor spoken as one -
I have seen sorrow cloak her as dark as a starless night...
but always seen her embrace heaven's joy that comes with the morning...
even when the night was long, she would say that life is worth living...
- and always invite joy to be part of the journey.
It is who she is, it is who she chooses to be, and it is a powerful and inspirational testimony, a legacy to me. I am eternally thankful for her, she continues to teach me about life through her own.
I love her.
Happy mother's day to you mom
and to every woman who is a mother to, or for someone.
-b
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